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"
At about two in the morning Vince woke me gently and asked, "May I make love to you again?"
"Of course. Sure."
He got out of bed and turned on the light. "I like to be able to see what I am doing," he said. This time was even more wonderful than the first. I kept pushing my vulva into him so that he went deeper and deeper. After Vince went back to sleep I thought about his wife.
Now there were only Ken and Larry. Both told me that it was unfair to leave them out after pleasuring Bill, Steve, and Vince.
I agreed and invited them to come over to my apartment for a Saturday afternoon. First Ken went with me. Then Larry enjoyed me. Then Ken did it again, followed by Larry. It was mechanical and unemotional, but they obviously enjoyed it. I did too, sort of. When they were finished with me they put their clothes back on, and returned to their wives, leaving me to have dinner by myself.
After that I was passed around like a gourmet treat on a silver platter. When I went on a business trip I accommodated the man or men I was with. When one of them told me that his wife would be away for an evening, I would invite him over to my apartment, fix dinner for him, make him feel young again, and prepare breakfast the next morning.
I told myself that I was not the company prostitute because they were not paying for anything. After Bill took me to two restaurants with his wife, none of the men took me anywhere because they did not want to be seen with a woman they were not married to. Except for Vince, none of the men gave me gifts and flowers. I paid for our evenings together at my apartment. It was I who purchased the excellent dinners with expensive bottles of wine that I prepared for them. Although I usually had breakfast food with milk when I was alone, I became expert in preparing fancy omelets for my colleagues when we had breakfast together.
My second year job review was as good as the first when I was still intact, but it was no better. Bill told me that he could not give me a raise. He said it was no reflection against me, but the company had been less profitable. I was almost relieved. As long as everyone knew that I was not using sex to advance in the company, as long as I paid for our trysts together, and as long as I did not harm their marriages, I could maintain my self-respect.
I did it because I had been alone for a long time, because I actually did like them, because they certainly enjoyed it, because I was beginning to enjoy it with the men other than Vince (who was always a delight), and because I did not have any obvious reason not to do it until I met Paul.
We met at church, and talked at the coffee hour after the service. He had served in the Marine Corps, and kept in shape by jogging and doing calisthenics. He worked as a UPS driver. Because he was so good looking and polite, I was sure he had a girl friend. When he told me he was alone, and asked to have lunch with me, I almost cried with relief.
He walked to my office. He was polite to everyone. I was very glad that the door to Bill’s office was closed, so Paul could not see the statuette. Then we walked to a nearby restaurant. I told myself that the worst that could happen would be that he would find that we did not have much to talk about other than the polite chit chat we were used to at church. As it happened, we had a great deal to talk about. Indeed, we had to keep track of the time, so that I would not be late returning for work.
When Paul walked back to my cubicle with me he asked if he could see me sometime for dinner. I told him he could.
Once again he walked to my office. Once again we walked to the restaurant. Once again we enjoyed each other’s presence and conversation. This time he walked to my car with me. I could see that he avoided being alone with me, so he could gain my trust that he was not a date rapist.
Several weeks went by. I had given him my telephone number. He did not call. At the coffee hour in church, we still talked, but it was as though nothing had happened. I thought that perhaps I had hoped for too much. Perhaps, he did not enjoy my conversation as much as I thought he did, and as much as I certainly enjoyed his.
Then he called, and asked to see a movie with me. This time he did drive to my apartment, and we drove to the movie. Afterwards we drove to a quiet bar to talk about the movie. This was my third date with Paul, and he had not said anything about having sex with me. He had not even tried to kiss me. When he did kiss me in front of my apartment door, I melted in his arms.
From then on Paul and I would see each other practically every week. Sometimes we would go to a restaurant. Sometimes we would see a movie, or a play. Sometimes we would spend Saturday afternoon riding our bicycles. Sometimes I would cook dinner for him. We spent a lot of time talking on the telephone. All we did was kiss and hold hands. He never once asked me to have sex with him. He did introduce me to his friends, even to his parents.
After three months of this I decided I needed to tell him about what I had been doing with my colleagues. "Are you disappointed with me?" I asked.
Paul took a long breath. "I do not expect a woman to be a virgin. I was when I joined the Marine Corps. I went to two brothels with friends of mine. I was impotent both times. It was not something I really wanted to do. Then I had a brief affair with a civilian. She had been with several men before me. She left me for an officer. When you go back to work Monday, I want you to tell your ‘friends,’ so called, that their fun is over."
"I told them that as soon as you asked me to have lunch with you."
Paul still had too much respect for me to take the initiative. Therefore I decided to seduce him and did. It was more wonderful than anything I had ever experienced. Paul was not as skilled as Vince. So what? For the first time in my life I made love to a man who loved me. We lay in bed afterwards talking about getting married and discussing how many children we wanted to have. Although UPS drivers are often promoted to supervisory and even executive positions, Vince said we should not have children until he was making a better income. That was fine with me. I still had time. I was also used to waiting. I had waited all of my life to find Paul.
After that night Paul made a point of visiting me at my office from time to time. He wanted to make sure that my colleagues got the message that I was in a committed relationship with a man who was young, strong, territorial, and actually somewhat pugnacious. The statuette disappeared from Bill’s desk.
We have already scheduled our wedding. It will be in our church. I will wear a white wedding dress that will cover me completely except for my hands and face. At Paul’s insistence, my colleagues and their wives have been invited. Paul wants to make sure that they watch me become his wife.
That’s fine with me. I actually do like them. Nevertheless, there is not any part of my heart that is not filled with my love for Paul. They can even dance with me at the reception if they want. It will be the last chance they ever get to touch me.
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