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She bowed in appreciation and stretched down to give them each a kiss on the cheek and a surreptitious feel of her boobs. One of them seemed to get tapped as spokesman for the party and stood up to get her attention. I saw him pull out a hundred dollar bill and say something to Esther. She smiled as she listened but shook her head. He then pulled out four more hundreds and laid them on the tip rail. Esther looked around for the bouncer and I did too, since this was way too flagrant, but no one was paying attention. She shook her head again and I could see her saying "I don't do that, sorry!"
She started to leave and he slid the short stack of c-notes toward her anyway. He raised his voice enough for me to hear, "Well, in case you change your mind, there's more where that came from..."
I wasn't offended because I was pretty sure she wouldn't go for it. I was only sore because the big surprise she had just pulled off was at my expense and how while I thought I was taking advantage of her indulgence I had been finessed from the start.
As the bouncer collected Esther's tips with a convenient push-broom, Kelly came up to stand with me as I waited. "This is hilarious. Usually the first girl has a bum deal because they never win these, but I think the others see what a tough act they have to follow this time."
I didn't think she was tagging along with me for company. "Don't tell me that you were in on this too?"
"What can I say, your girl's a big spender. Too bad I didn't get a chance to take her into the VIP, but her requests were pretty specific." Kelly gave me a playful swat on my ass as she left. "She asked me to tell you to bring the car around to the side door. Have a nice rest of the night."
I was waiting, leaning on the door of the car with my arms crossed when Esther walked out, once again decent in her street clothes but carrying her gym bag that she must have dropped off at the club some time in the week. I waited until she got close then charged and wound up chasing her around the car. She squealed and laughed as we sprinted in circles until I calmed down a bit and caught my breath. "Get in, dammit."
"Oh god, the look on your face when you recognized me up there!"
I felt myself flushing beet red again.
"Come on, you don't think that was funny?"
"You didn't look like you were trying to make people laugh," I said flatly, "you looked like you were trying to get some dicks hard."
"But that's the funny part. I totally didn't belong up there and so that was the last thing you ever expected."
"A joke can be really funny as long as the pie isn't on YOUR face."
"It was perfect. You tried to use that innocent "I'll behave" look on your face when she led you off to the back. As if. Then that look of complete confusion!"
"You sure know how to stretch my sense of humor, but yeah, you got me good. I came back thinking that you needed me to get you out of there and then you were whooping it up at the center of attention instead. You did you like it, right?"
"It was the best!"
"Well, if you had that much fun with it, then I think it was worth all the scheming. But I'm going to have to get even with you at some point."
She scoffed at the idea, "You can try."
She finally got a hold of her giggles and her smile turned sly instead. "Do you really think all those guys were turned on?"
"You know, after pulling off your big caper, the play-dumb act is pretty lame."
She bit a fingernail in exaggerated thought, alternately snickering and licking her chops as she recalled being on the stage. "Well, I wasn't really trying to make them horny."
"And yet you did. Most of them looked ready to rush the stage. And instead of looking worried you were eating it up."
"Do you guys always make fools of yourselves like that? I've never seen men throw money around with both hands that way. Quite literally." She broke into fresh laughter.
"No shit. But I don't think they've had a spectacle like that before in there. Lucky the bouncers didn't call the cops."
"Well, real talk now: even if guys really have scored with some of these "dancers", were any of them really that interested in anything but getting paid and gone?"
"Okay," I relented when I thought of it that way. "Okay. But you're making my point for me. I meant it that I wouldn't go there just to try to find a roll in the hay. It was just good fun at the time. And the ones that I did hook up with never even came close to what you've been giving me, like you said."
"I find you a little hard to believe, I think I better make sure of that tonight." She kissed me and looked carefully at my face, smiling warmly but not the least bit sorry. I was just going to have to accept that I was with a real fireball of a woman.
"I like this costume," she said as she took the pieces out of the bag to toy with them, "Too bad it takes so much work to get into it. Good thing I had help, I think i got it done in record time."
"Help?"
"I've been wanting to do something like this for a while and kept the idea shelved, in case you can't tell. Do you really think that ballroom is the only kind of dancing I wanted to explore? I'm just glad I had a chance to try it out. It took some arranging and a little luck shopping for my props, but it all came together."
"I wondered about that. That was an incredible show, but those girls in there don't put on acts like that, I don't think I've seen any before in person that were."
"I didn't learn it from them." she said evenly.
"Well, whoever showed you how sure knows how to entertain."
"It was like the biggest joke, I don't have the big boobs, big butt or big hair like all those girls in there. I didn't think I'd get anything more than polite applause, I just wanted to see what happened when you saw me up there."
"Those things don't matter, you put on one hell of a show. You saw how the audience reacted. Did you see the other girls getting even half that kind of response?"
"The manager did say I could come in and work anytime I wanted to start," she admitted.
"You're headliner material, you could dance anywhere with that kind of appeal. You'd have to tone it down a couple of notches, if anything."
"Yeah," her eyes flashed dangerously, " but where's the fun in that?"
"That's the spirit," I told her with a grudging but conspiratorial grin. Yes, I can be terribly slow on the uptake. I wondered just when had I lost sight of the pea. All along she had been testing the waters, and she had solidly called it.
"Did it turn you on, though?" she asked as I started driving. So there it was. I should have known it would come back to that.
"Like I said, I've never seen something like that before. Yeah. There are hot women and then there are really hot women. You are thermonuclear. And I guess you can finally pin it on me that I went to a strip club and took one home. Happy now?"
"Oh, I think I will be. You want to try the whip later?" she licked her lips and tapped me on the leg with the coils.
"I feel like I'm in in a sexual version of "Jackass". Am I going to have to keep checking over my shoulder for you to pull another fast one on me forever now?"
She didn't miss what I'd said and she sobered a moment for me. "We don't have forever, that's what I keep trying to teach you. Life's short, honey, let's steal a few breathless moments from Death while we still can."
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